Good evening my friends!! Today has been a day, a day that I wasn't expecting. When God does something He does it BIG. He is not a little God, but a God that spans the universe. I am still in awe. Hope you have a few minutes because this one will be lengthy! Stick with me, you won't regret it, I promise!
Well you are probably wondering what I did for my few hours of downtime. The highlight of that was vacuuming! LOL Yes you read correctly, vacuuming. Kalena hates the vacuum! So I either have to put it off, or hold her while doing it, neither is good! Oh and I got my car inspected. Another plus that was about 5 months overdue. Thank God, all the cops were too busy doing other things to notice! My wonderful mother was about to break out the belt for a good old fashioned whooping if I didn't go. Couldn't let that happen, LOL. So that was it for my rest time! But it was good, ooooo I almost had to play animal rescue looking for my mothers precious little apricot poodle Apollo! All I could think was, Lord please let us find him otherwise my father will be trying to send my mother to some counselor, psychiatrist or the emergency room!! Yeah don't ask about Baylor, Amanda, or that first year of college, she still shudders. LOL, But anyway, you are probably wondering about the GREAT thing God did today. Get to the good stuff already! LOL Well here goes.
Where to start is the question. Ok from circumstances that I cannot explain nor anyone else involved can explain I reconnected with my biological father today. This has been something I have been praying about for the past few months after running into a cousin in Wal-Mart. Thank God my mother was with me because I didn't at the time no anyone from that side of my family. After talking briefly with her, I knew I needed to find my family, and my father. Before we go on, years ago God raised up a wonderful man to be my daddy! He is and will always be my daddy. He was there from the time I was two until now, and even went to the pains of officially adopting me at the age of 10. I became a Babineaux from there on! He loved me, and treated me as if I came from his very loins. His daughter (my sister) from a previous marriage has always been my sister. We were always treated the same, and he never made differences between us and made sure we didn't either. I love him for that, he is wonderful, a God-send to me and my mother. But even he would tell me to always remember Jerry. :-) That was my father, and time, nor anything, nor anyone could change that. Even when I was too immature to accept it, he would always remind me.
In my late teens I prayed to meet him. God answered. This was our first official meeting that I can remember, however I wasn't ready for all that came with that. He wanted to be daddy, and that wasn't happening. I had one, didn't need another one. We butted heads, alot!! He was religious, I wasn't trying to hear that, especially from him. It's enough that I have his chin, his squinty eyes, and his fingernails, but he wants my heart too? Not going to happen!! Well time goes on, I move on. No time for that. I have babies, get married, yada yada. We reconnect again. This time I am a little older, and a little more accepting. My daddy says, don't push him away, give him a chance. He's trying. Still not really trying to hear that, but I am christian now so the right thing to do is try, right?? He and Mark hit it off. I try but can't connect, Mark can't understand why. He's pushing, it's like pushing against a brick wall, that wall is my heart. He's trying...... I'm not. I'm older, I have a family, I have a daddy, don't need another one. Some christian attitude right?!. We lose touch, and that's ok...... In my mind I say if he really wanted to find me, he knows how. 11 years go by. Little did I know, he was hurting. Rejected, refused, abused, mentally drained. Did I do all that??? He loves me with a love that only a father can! He suffers, I however go on.
Or so I think. Until that day in Wal-Mart. It's time Lord, it's time. So here we go, where do I start Lord?? Am I really ready?? I actually get a number. I call, it's not him, but a neighbor. He can barely breathe and tells me to call back tomorrow so he can deliver the message. Little did I know, Jerry got the message, but the neighbor is not stable so he blows him off. Yeah right, she can't be calling me. I don't deserve it, those are his words. The neighbor has mental issues, and no one believes anything he says, but poor thing, this time he got it right. I never call back. I plan on it, but I don't. If he wanted to talk he would call my mom. He didn't so oh well. But I couldn't give up on my extended family, facebook served it's purpose as far as connecting me with them. I felt honored, blessed,and accepted that they wanted to know me. The puzzle was coming together. It felt good. God was in the mix. I didn't know God would allow my son Keeland to play summer basketball with a cousin we didn't know existed, nor did they know. Is that why they hit if off so well in the beginning?? I didn't know I would see pictures of my great great grandfather. Beautiful! God is awesome!!! He planned it all out. Ask and you shall receive!!
So here we are today, 10/19/11. My mother's phone rings, his phone rings. They both say hello, reluctantly because the number shows restricted on one end, and not recognizable on the other. They exchange a few words. He thinks she's a bill collector, lol. My mother is so professional. He thinks, "O Lord what have I done" He tells her his name, Jerry, hmmmmm, she says well this is Michelle. She asks, Jerry who??? Granger perhaps, nawwww it couldn't be. IT IS!!! He is walking in the street, forgets where he is for a moment, how can it be. It's impossible, I didn't call you, you didn't call me, but our phones ring. Divine intervention. My God, you knew the day I would be ready. Am I ready? I am ready. I call, no answer. Five minutes later, I call back. Is this really me?? I actually can't wait to hear his voice. He FINALLY calls, I can't wait to talk. We talk, and talk, and talk. He's on FB. He found me awhile back. He tried to message me but my chat is turned off. He doesn't know how to send a a message. It's new to him so he waits. He didn't know how it would happen, but he knew it would. And God answered His son, with his daughter.
For the past few days, I have been seeing scriptures on healing. I'm not sick, or was I?? Was I harboring a disease called unforgiveness that I didn't know I had? Was the stench that bad to my Heavenly Father's nostrils? I want to please Him more than I want to breathe, so I had to get healed. In His graciousness He couldn't let His daughter remain that way. It's time My Child, it's time. Now I can bless you like you've been wanting. Let it go, and let Me go. Into your heart and clean it for you. It may not feel good at first, but oh is it worth it!
I am so grateful for this opportunity, I can't even express it. There are no words, except a humble Thank you Lord!!
So that's my story. He is a proud grandpa to 3, and a wonderful father. I now have 3 fathers. One who looks down and see's His daughter is trying, but still has a way to go, still has some junk to release. My heart is ready. One earthly daddy that is my heart, will always be, no one can take that place. He took me in, loved me, loved my children. He is the best papa in the world!! And then there is Jerry, my father. He has blossomed, been through hell and back. But he's back and that's all that matters, that's all that matters.
I am so honored that the Lord has blessed me and my family so, and I wanted to share.
Perhaps you have feelings you need to let go of, perhaps you don't know. You may be like me. Loving the Lord, but not fully surrendering it all. I shared the other day about the Lord searching my heart. Well I guess that came up in the search too. I thought I was done, but God want's every part of your heart clean. Not just a little but all! Let it go. I know it's scary, it's unfamiliar territory, but it's worth it. He will not allow you to be hurt in any way. Trust me, I know! And trust Him because He is trustworthy.
I love you all! Thank you for reading and I pray you are encouraged, I know I am. And please know, I cannot and won't take any credit for what has transpired today. God was molding me and preparing me, and I didn't know it. I was comfortable where I was. Didn't think I needed to change. But GOD!! The only thing I can boast about is what my Lord has done. I am so grateful. My God is a miracle worker. He blesses us with what we need, even when we don't know we need it.
Here are two prophetic words I read on a friends FB page, I knew the Lord was talking to me, but I didn't know about what at the time.