Bible Gateway

Friday, December 16, 2011

It's been awhile

Hello everyone!  

I have not written in quite some time.  My daughter has turned into a full blown toddler wanting to be with mommy alllllll day long, LOL! I am sneaking a few minutes while she is playing to write.  She has even gotten to the point that she will move my hand away from the keyboard, too smart!  I pray everyone has been well. 

So much has been happening in such a short time.  God is getting the glory through it all!  It has not been easy and it seems things are getting worse before they get better but today I saw a glimer of hope after pouring out my heart to God. Something I don't think I have done in a awhile.  I pray, but pour out.....not in awhile.  Pouring is refreshing. It's like a total body cleanse for your soul!!  :-)

God is just so awesome and so faithful, that's all I can say.  I am still waiting on some other prayer requests to manifest but I know it won't be long!  Praise God.  Well my little one is grabbing my hand again so I guess I better go! LOL

I do want to leave you with this prophetic Word I received from Minister Ivan Tait. It will encourage you to keep going no matter how hard it seems. When I read this it didn't mean much....until today!!  Satan is a liar, and a thief and I refuse to give him any ground in my life. Not an inch, yard or centimeter!! 

Just keep pleasing God with your life and He will MAKE all your enemies live at peace with you, Proverbs 16:7 . It doesn't matter if those enemies are coworkers, so called friends or even family.  God protects His children, Psalm 91.  They may do you wrong, but God keeps a record. Just keep your heart pure and free from bitterness and trust Him. Vengeance His the Lords! Romans 12:19   Be blessed!!

A Sevenfold Day


And he said to the woman, Thy faith hath saved thee; go in peace.
Luke 7:50, KJV

 
Today your faith will actually save you from circumstances and situations that you are going to face. The only thing that you are going to have when it is all over, when the dust settles, is peace. You are going to go out in peace and stand in peace because your faith will carry you and rescue you from every destruction and calamity. Now you will have the peace and freedom that comes from My own hand--the peace of being delivered from every snare. 

No matter what you face today, the enemy's plans will blow up in his face, and you will stand there with all his spoil. Today is a sevenfold-return day. Be prepared and get ready; great things are going to happen! Drink in the knowledge of My forgiveness and heal the bitter pools in people's hearts. Enjoy My abiding presence upon you and walk in the realization of My power. Revel in the sweetness of communion with Me. Celebrate each soul that you introduce to Me and practice surrendering your will to Me when you don't want to. Let your life be a living sacrifice all day long, for this is the highest form of worship you can offer.

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Tired

For only five short, bold, beautiful minutes. Unscripted and unedited. We just write without worrying if it’s just right or not.

I’m so relieved to have these five minutes. Won’t you join me?
    Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking. 
OK, are you ready? Give me your best five minutes on:

Tired…

GO

Tired, I am tired of not loving God like I should.  Not listening to the Holy Spirit like I need to.  

They are my life, my everything or are they?..... I am tired of myself......not living up to what I know I can. 

God has chosen me to live this life for Him, and if I give up and get tired, then what??  God has been so good, so loving, so caring, so kind.  I can't afford to get tired of running, I can't afford to give up. But I am tired.....Tired of the enemies tactics against my family.  Tired of his bullying us around.  Praise God for Jesus and His blood that draws the line in the sand.  I don't have to be tired anymore.  I can choose to be refreshed.  I praise God in my tiredness, and He restores my soul and spirit. I fight the devil when I tired because in my weakness God shows up.  Don't give up, don't give in. Fight, Praise, Worship even in your tiredness.  He will show you the way.  God loves you and cares for you even and especially when you are tired.  :-)

  

Isaiah 40:30-31(NIV)

Even youths grow tired and weary,
   and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the LORD
   will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
   they will run and not grow weary,
   they will walk and not be faint.

 

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

You Won't Relent- Misty Edwards




I love this song too!! :-) Very powerful

It's late

I know it's late but I haven't written in a few days.  My baby girl is finally alseep so I thought I would take advantage of the time.  She is going through her clingy stage so I can't get much blogging done through the day.

Today was another "Monday". None of us wanted to get up after the holiday! We made it though, dragging nonetheless, but we made it. Today was also one of those days I wish I could do over.  Nothing bad happened, but I know I need to get back on the strong track with the Lord.  I need to get back in my Word and close, close fellowship with Him.  I feel like I am wasting so much time!  Ever have those moments?   I thank God He is a redeemer of time, but we are also responsible for the time He gives us.  We have to be good stewards of it.  I am going to stop talking about what I need to do, and just do it!  Just be it!  Be a better wife, a better mother, a better sister in Christ. Just be!!  :-)   My former Pastor taught us that. Just be what you know you need to be.  Stop talking about it, just be it! 

So yeah this post is not really about anything, just random thoughts.  Nothing really "super" spiritual to write on, just felt like writing.  I do look forward to sharing but lately I just haven't been in the blogging mood, so when it hit I wanted to take advantage of that.  Is that normal??  To all those experienced bloggers out there, do you guys have those days??   I am sure you do, it's just nice to hear you are not alone.

In spite of, God is and has been so good. I just need to get in His presence for a time of renewal and refreshing.  Seems like this time of year should be so exciting, but it's not.  Trying to get in the Christmas mood but it's kinda hard for some reason. I put out a few decorations thinking that would "do" it but nope.  I think I just need more of my Father.  You can only neglect your Spirit man for so long.  It starts feeling dry and parched and it affects everything you do and those around you.  You can only fake it for so long. 

That reminds me of a song, My Soul Longs for You, by Misty Edwards.  That's whats wrong. My soul and spirit are longing for my Father.  I know what I need to do, now Holy Spirit give me the strength to do it.  God is so awesome, how could I neglect Him. He takes time to love on me, how much more should I do the same for Him (regardless of feelings).

He has been doing some amazing things in the lives of my friends and family.  For that I give Him praise.  I will praise Him no matter how I feel.  I will praise Him because He is worthy.  It's not about me at all. It's a sacrifice and I see why. 

Well I guess that's it for now. Thanks for listening to my ramblings! I hope I didn't sound like I was complaining. Just emptying my head,  LOL.  Good night!


Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Things I am not thankful for!

Thanksgiving is almost here, and everyone is getting ready for the excitement, food, family or just a day of rest.

Lots of people are taking the time to list things they are thankful for this holiday season. We always take this time of year to really focus on the things we are thankful for (we should do this everyday).  The holiday of Thanksgiving is a time to reflect on the Goodness of God and all the ways the Lord has blessed us!

I could follow that pattern and list the things I am thankful for, but I want to look at things different.  I am going to tell you some things I am not thankful for!! Yep there are some things I am not thankful for, and never will be. So here goes!!

1. I am not thankful for death, but I am thankful for Jesus. He died so I don't have to mourn, and if I accept Him as Lord I don't have to "die", I will only transfer to my new home when my earthly mission is complete.  Isaiah 53, Revelation 14:13, 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18, 1 Corinthians 15:55

2.  I am not thankful for sickness and disease, I am thankful for Jehovah Rapha who is my healer and heals all of my diseases!  Exodus 15:22-26, Psalm 103, 1 Peter 2:20-26

3.  I am not thankful for poverty, but I am thankful for Jehovah Jireh, He always provides! Genesis 22:12-14, Philippians 4:19

4.  I am not thankful for confusion, but I am thankful for Jehovah Shalom, He is my peace!  Judges 6:22-24, Isaiah 9:6, Isaiah 26:3, 1 Corinthians 14:33

5.  I am not thankful for the times I have felt alone or afraid, but I am thankful for Jehovah Shammah who is always here!   Ezekiel 48:35, 2 Timothy 1:7

6. I am not thankful for feeling lost, without a guide, but I am thankful for Jehovah Rohi, my sheppard, Psalm 23! I am also thankful for the Holy Spirit who never leaves my side, and is my comforter and guide. John 14:16,26

7.  I am not thankful for hard battles and trials, but I am thankful for Jehovah Nissi. He is my banner and I can run to him when the battle gets too much for me!  He is my deliverer.     Exodus 17:15, 2 Chronicles 20:14-15

8.  I am not thankful for my sin, and unworthiness, but I am thankful for Jehovah M'kaddesh, the God who sanctifies! Leviticus 20:8.   

9.  I am not thankful for unrighteousness, but grateful for Jehovah-Tsidkenu. He is my righteousness. Jeremiah 23:5-6. Thankful for Jesus too! He became my righteousness so I could be reconciled to the Father once and for all! 2 Corinthians 5:21

10.  I am not thankful for the times I feel weak, but I am thankful for Elohim. He is strong, prominent, and mighty! Deuteronomy 10:17, 2 Corinthians 12:9-10


So as you see I really am thankful but there are lots of things I am not thankful for. I thank God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit for being everything I am not, doing what I can't, and loving me anyway! I pray you all have a very Happy Thanksgiving! We have so much to be thankful and grateful for! :-)


Monday, November 21, 2011

Why I Write

Write it girl, Week 3! Topic for the week; 
"When was the moment you first believed you were a writer?"

I never considered my self a writer.  NEVER. I am not a writer by nature, nor a reader by nature. Not my preconceived nature of what I had become by my own ideas anyway, but God had other plans.

I started this blog after meeting a friend on FB and she suggested I check out another blog for ideas on making money at home.  I am a SAHM of 3, so I was looking for a way to bring in a little extra income.  Blogging was one of the ideas.

I admired other blogs, but never seriously considered one for myself. I thought it would be hard and tedious. I thought you needed experience.  What in the world would I have to write about?  What would I say?  I am naturally a quiet person so talking in front of others is sometimes difficult.  I have always been quiet. I am not big on sharing my feelings and emotions.

I would envy people that had talents, that were walking in their calling. What was mine??? I am not really good at anything. I can't sew, I can't draw, I can't sing, or anything close to any of that. 

I started the blog anyway. I figured it if didn't work out I could always delete it.  I started to notice that things would come to me in the night. Profound things, things that I know my mind didn't come up with. I felt like I needed to write this stuff down, but never would. I would usually blow it off, or sometimes I would share it on Facebook, but as we know you have a limit as to how much you can write, or you would have to write a note and not many people read those.

My first post was short because I was afraid if it was too long I wouldn't have anything else to blog about, LOL.  Again God had other plans!  I enjoyed it, and amazingly I haven't run out of things to write about.  I know this is all God and take no credit because never would I have thought I would be writing anything but my name! :-)    I go back and read some of the posts and think, "WOW Lord, I know this has to be you and the Holy Spirit"!  I am honored that He has blessed me with this ministry.  The opportunity to write, to share, to encourage and to experience His grace, love and mercy through words.  I am learning about myself!  I am amazed at the things He tells me and shows me through the blogging process.  I am touched, encouraged and feel His presence every time I began to write.  I can't explain the feeling but it can be overwhelming at times, at least for me anyway.  I get excited when I think about writing. The computer has become my little sanctuary if you will. I know He will always meet me here.  

I have been able to share so many of my life experiences and gained many friends in the process.  I love it, and cannot imagine my life without blogging! 

Thank you Jesus for allowing me the opportunity to share You, to experience You, to be in awe of You through writing.  I still don't consider myself a writer. I can't see me writing a book or anything. I do consider myself an ordinary girl just pouring out my life for the Lord over the computer. A Blogger for Jesus is what I am, and I don't take that lightly! God is awesome, and I am honored to be used by Him!

Jeremiah 29:11

For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.

Isaiah 55:8-9

  “My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord.
      “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.
  For just as the heavens are higher than the earth,
      so my ways are higher than your ways
      and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.



Write It Girl, (week 3)   Follow this link to read about more bloggers and why they began to write!

Roscoe

Roscoe, yeah Roscoe.  

He is a stray dog my husband picked up a few years ago from his old job.  Roscoe was matted, hungry, tired, but happy!  Happy to be chosen, fed, and loved.  We kept Roscoe for a few days before finding him a home.  I told my husband I didn't want another dog!  

Keeland actually spilled the beans because Mark knew not to put him in plain sight, he didn't want to hear my mouth! LOL  So, I walk in the house and Keeland keeps looking out the patio window and smiling......I already knew. Roscoe was and is still happy. He roams, he's free, and he just wants to have fun!  His new owner was so happy to have him, and Roscoe was happy to be with them.  Well his owner left and Roscoe is roaming again, but somehow he always finds his way back to our house.  Just to say hello!

I know God sent Roscoe to me one night, and here's why.  I am not normally a fearful person. I try not to be anyway, but there has been an unusual amount of crime sprees going on lately.  I suppose it's due to the holidays.  While I know God is there to protect me, sometimes I let the circumstances drown that out.  Well, Mark and Keeland left one evening to go to their weekly men's bible study. *Side note* Praise God for daddies that instill righteousness in their children, especially their boys!  

OK, so they left. Kalena and I are here, Kayla is at my moms for the night.  All of a sudden this fear came over me. I started praying then I heard Roscoe outside barking.  Not really what I wanted to hear because we all know dogs bark when they see something.  So I peek out the window, nothing.  Roscoe quiets down.. I pray and praise God for protection......he barks again. Mercy! Will he please stop!! I know "things" are out there but I don't really care for an announcement.  Kalena falls asleep, (dang, my little company has conked out on me) Normally I would be glad, but I kinda wanted her awake, LOL.  I tell myself I have to get a grip and go to bed myself.  Roscoe barks again......UGH!! I try to block it out.  I crawl into bed, read my word and I began to relax. I started to think " you know Roscoe isssss here", if  "someone" does try something he will get their attention at least". I look out and he is sitting right in front of the front door! Protecting our house. Protecting me in a sense. :-)  I get back in bed, and try to fall asleep.  I hear the Lord say, "See how you began to feel so secure because you know Roscoe is here?"  "Well, I want you to feel secure like that all the time, because I AM is here ALL THE TIME"!  Did I immediately stop being afraid?  No, but I felt more at peace.  Thank you Lord! I finally fell asleep and rested. 

When Mark finally arrived, Roscoe was gone. I thank God for allowing a little scraggly, matted dog to look out for me, but I thank God more for being the ultimate protector that never leaves!!  Praise God! Bless Jesus!  I never have to be afraid and neither do you.  :-)

2 Timothy 1:7 (NLT) 

For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.

  

Psalm 91 The Lord—the One We Trust

  He who lives in the safe place of the Most High will be in the shadow of the All-powerful. I will say to the Lord, “You are my safe and strong place, my God, in Whom I trust.” For it is He Who takes you away from the trap, and from the killing sickness. He will cover you with His wings. And under His wings you will be safe. He is faithful like a safe-covering and a strong wall.
  You will not be afraid of trouble at night, or of the arrow that flies by day. You will not be afraid of the sickness that walks in darkness, or of the trouble that destroys at noon. A thousand may fall at your side, and ten thousand at your right hand. But it will not come near you. You will only look on with your eyes, and see how the sinful are punished. Because you have made the Lord your safe place, and the Most High the place where you live, nothing will hurt you. No trouble will come near your tent.
  For He will tell His angels to care for you and keep you in all your ways. They will hold you up in their hands. So your foot will not hit against a stone. You will walk upon the lion and the snake. You will crush under your feet the young lion and the snake.
  Because he has loved Me, I will bring him out of trouble. I will set him in a safe place on high, because he has known My name. He will call upon Me, and I will answer him. I will be with him in trouble. I will take him out of trouble and honor him. I will please him with a long life. And I will show him My saving power.

Friday, November 18, 2011

2011 - Growth

Thought this was pretty cool! From The Gypsy Mama! For five minutes we write, no editing, no thinking about it. Just write!  Today’s topic is Grow.

Go.

Ok here goes! Just write. Ok....

2011 Has certainly been a year of growth for our family.  Last year I lost my grandmother (was not expecting it), I had a baby (was not expecting it, lol)  my husband lost and got another job, my children changed schools, we changed churches (we were there for 10 years) I started this blog, I reconnected with my dad after 10 yrs, and the biggest of all, I left my job to be home with my babies, we have 3! WHEW!!

I have seen God move in so many ways this year by all of these changes.  The most important thing I learned is that God doesn't change.  He knew everything that would happen and prepared us all for it. God is just awesome like that.  He never changes!

Through it all I have felt the stretching and pruning that comes with growth.  I guess you call them growing pains!  Boy have I felt them! It may not always feel good at the time, but in the end you appreciate all the changes.......at least I know I do.

God has shown Himself this year, and I can't wait to see what He is going to do next year! Whatever happens I know He is already there waiting for us! Be blessed  :-)

Malachi 3:6
"I am the LORD, and I do not change. That is why you descendants of Jacob are not already destroyed".

Hebrews 13:8
Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

STOP.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

GO

I heard a message tonight that opened my eyes. 

I didn't know they were closed.........until tonight.  

I want to live out this faith, live out my Jesus.  With no apologies, just radical living.  What will He ask me to do?  I don't know, but I await the answer.  I want Him to be in me so deep that my body exudes His heavenly fragrance.  Not for my pleasure or glory, but for His!  I want to stop being afraid because if His love is really in me, it cast out all fear.  

My ministry is here, my ministry is nowIt's not in the sweet by and by.....it's in the present.  It's waiting on me to act, to move, to do, to go.  My ministry is my home, my family, my neighborhood......and its waiting!

Sweet Jesus engulf me in your love so that I may live out this life for you.  We sing the song " I Give Myself Away" but how much have we given away??  A snippet here, a snippet there?  Jesus doesn't want a snippet, He wants it ALL.  The lost don't need a snippet of Jesus, they need all of Jesus!  They die and go to hell every second, but we eat the Word and sit on it.  We are spiritual pigs wallowing in our own mud.  While they die........

Someone saved me from the flames, now I must make it my duty to be a light and a witness to the walking dead.  I was a dead women walking once, but someone snatched me from the flames.  Will I do the same??  Am I too afraid to get burned??  I shouldn't be.  If he can save Daniel from the lion's den, and the firey furnace surely he can help me too. 

Jesus forgive me......for my apathty,  my empathy,  my wallowing.  

No, I want to be burnedBurned for Jesus!! Light a fire under me so that my feet can't be still.   My feet must go to do your work!

Jesus I write for you.....I care for my children for you......I love my husband for you.....I smile at a stranger for......YOU.

Make me uncomfortable (did I  just say that?)  Yes flesh, I did! MAKE ME UNCOMFORTABLE JESUS (I said it again)! 

Forgive me for wasting time! I am here Jesus.....use me!

Romans 10:9-10   If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved. 

Mark 16:15   And then he told them, “Go into all the world and preach the Good News to everyone.

 

Monday, November 14, 2011

Favor in the eyes of our children

I know that title probably sounds funny.  You may say "why would a parent need favor in the eyes of their child?"  We are the parents right, and what we say should go right??

I agree, but I also remember being a child and the hard time I gave my mom.  I say my mom because I knew better than to look, talk, act, or even breathe sideways with my dad! LOL  It wasn't because he was mean or anything like that.  Quite the opposite, he probably let us get away with more than my mom, LOL. He would always say " Let them children be". I just knew better though, there was an invisible line I didn't want to cross.

So yeah, I apologize to my mom, alot.  Especially now that I have an almost teenager on my hands!!

It's not easy by any means, raising someone that is so similar to the way you were when you were a child.  Galatians 6:7 rings through my ears.  That's not to say my child is a bad child, far from it. She is just....ahem, strong willed, LOL.  She has a strong personality, and sometimes you forget you are dealing with a child!

But back to where I was going.  We are in the process of making some changes in our home.  My husband and I want to please God more than anything, which means we will have to stop allowing certain things into our home.  Things like certain movies, music, and images.  Of course they say "well it's only music, or it's just a cartoon" but what they don't realize it's sooooo much more than that.

I will be honest and say I hate addressing this with our children because it's hard to let go of certain things, especially when they have been allowed for so long.  Kids get tired of hearing "because I said so, or because God said so".  They want explanations.  

I know some old schooled parents would say, "Uh uh you don't have to explain anything to a child". While that may be true in some cases, I do feel kids need to know why we make the choices we make.  

We all know if we just say don't do that what's the first thing a child will do???  That starts while they are little.  Curiosity sometimes gets the best of them.  It goes all the way back to Adam and Eve. God said don't eat from this one tree and immediately they let the enemy stroke their curiosity nerve. 

It's in all of us.  

So as we make these changes I do pray we find favor with our children so their hearts will be receptive to see why we are making these changes, and it's not just because God said so, but here is why He said so.  This is where I need to make sure I am in my Word and hearing from God like I should!

Alot of times when parent's talk all kids hear are "blahblahblah" or you can't do this, or that.  My son likes to tell me "you never let me do..." when he asks me something and I say no.  I don't want them to think all they hear are rules.

I also more importantly don't want to them think God is just a God of rules, and judgements. I want them to see He wants what is best for them a million times more than we do. I want to make sure they know they have an enemy that is fighting tooth and nail for their souls, minds and very being.  He doesn't fight fair and will fight at all costs.  As parents we have to fight, even when it doesn't feel good because we know it's not about feelings at all.

This is why I pray for favor, and I pray for God's forgiveness in being so nonchalant about certain things we have allowed as to not offend our kids, or to just keep peace in our home.

If you think about it, it's not really keeping peace because you just create an atomosphere of confusion in the long run because now they will want to know "why did you let me do it before?" 

I will just continue to confess that God softens their hearts and allows them to really hear what we have to say and why we are making these changes.

Pray for your own children if you have them, or if you don't just pray for children in general. They need it more now than ever before!!  Our children have questions and we need to be ready with the answers!

Deuteronomy 11:19-21 New International Version (NIV)
Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 20 Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates, 21 so that your days and the days of your children may be many in the land the LORD swore to give your ancestors, as many as the days that the heavens are above the earth.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Words! Think before you speak!

Words are powerful! 

Words can hurt........words can bless. Watch your words carefully because once they are spoken they cannot be taken back.  It doesn't matter if the words are spoken or written, they still have power. It also doesn't matter if they are spoken by your own mouth to yourself or by someone else.  They still have the same power.

Words that hurt go deep, deep into the mind.  They wound deeper than a knife sometimes. If you have been hurt by words, just know that Jesus is there to wipe away the wounds with His precious blood.  He will heal you, and make you whole!  Speak words of blessing over yourself.  Speak words of praise to the Father.

Counteract the unkind words spoken over you and to you.  Counteract it with the Word of God! 

Maybe you didn't hear the words, but heard about the words spoken over you, or maybe you did hear and you can't get over it......began to speak blessings into your atmosphere.

People that speak hurtful words are hurting in ways we may never understand. No excuse, but now you know why.  They can't hurt you physically but they know words can do more damage.  Words become thoughts, and thoughts linger.  Thoughts pop up at the worst times! They come in our weak moments.  

Satan knows when to remind us. 

I think it all goes back to "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" If only more people would practice that......

Use the power of your words to uplift, encourage, and bless those around you. Whether it's a stranger, friend, or family member. You never know how your kind words may be just the "word" they need to hear.  You also never know how your words may be the one to take that person off the edge of the cliff they have been standing on.  Choose wisely! 

Remember we must give an account for every word spoken.....good or bad (Matthew 12:36-37).

Watch what you put in, because that is what will come out.  Get into the Word of God and find His Words, Words of power and life.  Let that be your new language of love......to yourself, and others!

Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.     Proverbs 18:21
The mouth of the righteous is a fountain of life.    Proverbs 10:11
Therefore encourage each other with these words.  1 Thessalonians 4:18
  
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if any-thing is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.     Philippians 4:8

Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;    2 Corinthians 10:5

For the word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires.   Hebrews 4:12

Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.   James 1:19

Too much talk leads to sin. Be sensible and keep your mouth shut. Proverbs 10:19

A truly wise person uses few words; a person with understanding is even-tempered.  Proverbs 17:27

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Forgiving vs. Trust

Good morning everyone! Praying all is well out there!  :-)

A friend of mine posted a statement on FB that really didn't hit me until now.  She said "As Christians we must forgive but I don't have to trust you or forget about what you did".

Of course someone came right behind her telling her how that was wrong, and what's the point in forgiving if you won't forget. There is a big difference.  The lady even went to the point of using the scripture Psalm 103:12.  That scripture is God speaking, not a man!

We will all have the opportunity to exercise our forgiveness muscle in this life.  Even something as small as a minor offense, to something as large as murder requires forgiveness.  That doesn't mean it's easy by any means either way.

We all experience hurt because we are all imperfect.  Whether the offense was intentional or not we must forgive, but must we forget??  I think it's important that we cleanse our minds daily with the blood of Jesus in order to not let our past hurts affect us later in life.  Of course something's are so hurtful it's hard to forget them.  The quote "Time heals all wounds" proves true.  Some hurts just take time to heal and that's ok.  Jesus came to heal our wounds.....physical and emotional.  He knows some scars go deep and will take time.

What does it mean when I forgive someone?? Is it wrong that I don't trust them?? I say no.  Say someone is taken advantage of when they were young. They may never forget what has happened to them but will choose to forgive the person.  As hard as it may be, they have to. More for themselves than the other person.  That means when you see them, instead of feeling angry and bitter you feel love, almost sympathy for them. You choose to see them through the eyes of God and His grace.  That is something that comes from God and not from ourselves, and it is a choice!!
 
OK, so you have forgiven them, not holding the past infraction against them.  But are you required to trust them? No! And that's ok. You would most likely never leave your own children with this person, and you may not want to be alone with this person.  Is that wrong? No.  Trust has to be earned.  People may argue, well you haven't really forgiven them.  Not true, you are not required anywhere in scripture to trust anyone.....ever really.  The word of God says to trust no man, why?  Because people make mistakes, and have the ability to hurt you.  God cannot!   We must put our complete and total trust in God and Him alone.

Of course you learn to trust people again.  Don't let past hurts keeping you from loving and trusting those you know are trustworthy.  Don't punish everyone for the mistakes of one person!

Do your best with the Holy Spirit's help to walk in love, towards everyone. Your love walk will help your forgiveness walk. The Word says love keeps no records of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13:5). That means you choose to not keep a mental journal of every wrong thing done to you.  You can't function in life doing that.  You have to move on at some point. Again it's a choice!

And remember we all need forgiveness.  From God, from people and from ourselves.  

Yes precious little you is capable of hurting people too!!  We all have, and we all do.  Remember though when you do, seek forgiveness from the person you hurt, but know you don't have the right to set the terms this time.  Leave it in God's hand, and pray you find favor in their eyesight. Once you have done that, don't let them torture you with it. Stay away if you have to, until they let you know it's ok.  This may take time!  Be patient with them as they work through it.  It may seem small to you but may be very hurtful to them.  And forgive yourself (sometimes this is the hardest)

I notice that works the other way around.  I have a few people that have hurt me pretty bad in the past.  I have forgiven them, but God has also been so gracious in not forcing me to deal with these people very often.  I rarely see them, but when I do I am not angry.  I don't see them and immediately try to remember what they did.  Of course it's still there, and you better believe satan would love for me to dwell on it, but who does that hurt more??  Me of course. 

Just remember God loves you, Jesus died for your healing and everything will be ok!  There is no wound too deep that the blood of Jesus cannot heal and cover. You are not alone in this.  The Father knows what happened and He will work on your behalf to make it right.  Just make sure you do your part!  Forgive and leave the rest to Him!  :-)

Matthew 6:14 For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you (attitude: forgive because you love the Lord)

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. (attitude: can love cover it?)

Ephesians 4:31-32 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.(attitude: loving and forgiving just like God forgave you)
 
Psalm 118:8 It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.

Monday, November 7, 2011

Peace

Peace has been on my mind all weekend.  I felt God's peace all around me.  I hate to say but it didn't seem warranted.  That doesn't make sense to my mind.  I know I should walk in God's peace all the time, but I don't.  But this past week was different.  Nothing really changed, but His peace was there. I suppose it was all along.  It was real, it was tangible.  I just have this knowing that every little thing is going to be ok.  I really don't want this feeling to end, but I know I should not be moved by my feelings, because if it does "end" I need to remember God's peace is here, around me, all the time.  I have proof!  No matter what I face, Jehovah Shalom is always there.  He is the God of peace.  It's His nature.  There is no confusion in Him.  Even when life gets unsettled, God is always there.  My head knows that, but my heart doesn't always accept it.  Now I know.  God loves me, as He does you.  Let His peace rule your heart, mind and actions from now on.  Let's make a concentrated effort to dwell in and on the peace of God.  Have all my prayers been answered?? No, but that's ok.  I know God is working it out.  I just know.  If it doesn't change overnight, that's ok.  I refuse to worry.  I choose today to dwell in peace.  My prayer is the same for you.  No matter what is going on in your life right now, the very moment you read this, cast down your worries, and choose to dwell in peace.  Peace with God, yourself, your circumstances, your family.  I don't care how bad it looks now, just trust that God is working it out for you.  You may say "yeah that's easy for you, you don't know what I am dealing with" You are right, I don't know, but God does.  Maybe you have prayed with no immediate answer in sight......keep praying, keep hoping, and you will find peace, Peace will find you.  Jesus is my peace, and He can be yours too.  I once had a license plate border that read " No Jesus....No Peace, Know Jesus......Know Peace"  I know you struggle.  We all do.  Your struggles may be bigger than mine, but peace can cover you, like your favorite blanket. "Peace is like hot chocolate for my soul"  Who doesn't like hot chocolate??  OK if you don't, let it be that warm tea, hot coffee or that nice big bowl of hot gumbo!  Maybe you like hot apple cider....let it be that.  Just let it be! Peace is there for the asking and taking.  Reach out your hand, and I promise it will overtake you!  Thank God for His peace!!   :-)

Matthew 11:28-30  Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

John 14:27  Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.

Numbers 6:25-26 the LORD make his face to shine upon you and be gracious to you; the LORD lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace.

John 16:33 I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

Philippians 4:6-7  do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Isaiah 12:2  “Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust, and will not be afraid; for the LORD GOD is my strength and my song, and he has become my salvation.”

Colossians 3:15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful.

Isaiah 9:6 For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Change

Change....It's a word most will say very few people like. The more I thought about it, that's really not true.  Most people don't mind change...self initiated change that is.  We work......we get bored on our jobs so we want to change jobs.  We change friends, we change clothes, we change the food we eat for health benefits. We don't mind those changes because we can control them!  That's it.......we like control.  Now, change that comes when we least expect it....that's a no go for most of us.  When we say YES to God we must be prepared for change at some point or another.  Sometimes it's scary, most of the times it's scary.  Being unsure of what's on the horizon is not always fun.  Changing jobs is fun most of the time because we can say yes or no to the jobs we see.....we get to choose our change.  When God changes us or asks us to make a change in our direction that can rock our world, we shrink back.  Well at least I know I do.  It all goes back to how bad do we want to please God?  This is a question I am asking myself, even now.  Change has been a constant in our household this past year.  I wrote about some of the changes we have been through. Having a baby, leaving my job, changing churches, kids changing schools, Marks job.  All of these things were scary......at first.  After the dust settles and you can see your way it's not so bad after all.  Change is good even when it doesn't feel like it.  It's necessary in some cases.  Does this mean I have totally embraced the unknowing changes that may arise in my life?.... nope!  :-)   I know God is there in and through the change if and when it occurs.  I think of a dear friend of mine that God instructed to move across the country with his family.  That family consisted of himself, his wife and their young son.  All I could think was WOW!  Would I have obeyed that call??  They did it, not completely without fear, but with trust that the God who calls also supplies.  They are loving their change and God is opening up doors they never imagined.  I look at my pastor.  He moved him and his wife all the way from Florida to Texas to serve in a ministry far from home and family. God has blessed them immeasurably because of their obedience, and blessed us because of their obedience.  God-Called change takes obedience, nothing more, and certainly nothing less.  It takes saying "Lord you are really my lord and I lay down my life before you....do with me as YOU will"  It's really saying " Not my will, but yours Lord"  We all say those words, but what happens when they.....happen!  Are we ready??  I can honestly say I am not, but I know the Lord will walk with me.  He will see me and you both through any change that comes our way.  Let's do our best, with the Holy Spirit's help, to be obedient and embrace God induced change.  It may be unsettling at first, but I have a feeling we won't regret it.

Be blessed!

We love him, because he first loved us
1 John 4:19

Monday, October 31, 2011

Stay at home moms have Monday's too!

Hello everyone!  Praying you all had a good weekend!  Today started a little slow and I didn't feel so great, emotionally.  It's Monday. While it's a beautiful Monday, it's still Monday.  I thought I would be exempt from this feeling once I came home, but nope!  Monday's are still....Monday! LOL  

I woke up in a blah kinda mood.   After a weekend of sickness, bad haircuts, and running around I was pooped!!  I was a little upset with the kids too, as I had asked one to clean their room, and the other to clean up a spill from where they ate last night.  Neither got done.  A sink full of dishes, clothes to wash, clothes laying on the floor and chair in the den didn't make it better.  Normally I would've fussed, fussed all the way to school.  They would have been tired of hearing my mouth, but for some reason today, I didn't.  Just didn't feel like it.  I didn't want to actually.  The more I thought of it, do I really want to send my babies off to school hearing a lecture??  They deal with so much throughout the day that I cannot imagine, I want them to leave my presence in peace.  Not in dread of coming home, because mama is going to fuss some more. Now I will remind them of what I asked, and I will make sure the things get done, but I will do it in love. 

That was my scripture for the day,  1 Corinthians 16:14  Let all that you do be done in love.  
 
I really didn't have much to write about today, but this came to mind as I prayed for direction.  It's a simple message, love. Let love be your guide today as you interact with people!  Even as you interact with yourself.  You may mess up, but you know what, God loves you, and you should love yourself!  You are special, and were made on purpose for a purpose!  Jesus died for you, and He loves you so very much!  Don't ever forget that.  Remember nothing can separate you from the love of God, Romans 8:38-39.  

Ok, so this turned from a blog about Monday's, to a blog about love! LOL   Holy Spirit have your way  :-)  

Have a great day today. Remember God loves you, and Jesus died for you to prove it!

This is my prayer for you today:

Ephesians 3:19
May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

Just a few scriptures on Love:
Psalm 36: 7
Psalm 91: 14
1 John 4: 8
Romans 5: 8
Hebrews 13: 1
John 13: 35
Hosea 2: 23

Friday, October 28, 2011

A Bloggers Prayer - Taken from the blog, A Holy Experience

I had to repost from a blog I follow, A Holy Experience. This speaks volumes, and is my prayer also.

Upside Down blogging, with Jesus increasing and us decreasing, begins with us bowed in prayer over a keyboard… so we begin in prayer…
A Blogger’s Prayer
I am no longer my own blogger, but Thine.
Refine me with each post how You will, rank me how You will.
Put me to service, or put me to suffering.
Let me be a follower, instead of seeking followers
Let me post for thee or be put aside for thee,
Lifted high, only for thee, or brought low, all for thee.
Do with me and each post whatever you will, because You alone know best.
Let me not strive but submit
Let me not compete but care
Let me not desire hits but holiness
Let my blog be full of You, and let it be empty of me.
Let me crave all things of You, let me care nothing of this world.
Let my words be worthy of the greatest of audiences: You.
And You are enough.
May I write not for subscribers… but only for Your smile.
May my daily affirmation be in the surety of my atonement not the size of my audience.
May my identity be in the innumerable graces of Christ, never, God forbid,
the numbers of my comments.
And may the only words that matter in my life not be the ones I write on a screen —
but the ones I live with my skin.
I freely and heartily yield every sentence, every title, every post, every comment… or no comments… all to Your pleasure and perfect will.
My only fame is that I bear your name
My only glory is the gift of Your Grace
My only readership, Your eyes that seek to and for to find a heart hard after you.
Make this so. Lord…
Yahweh, You alone are my God, not Google
Jesus, You alone are my Savior, not site meters
And Holy Spirit, you alone are my Comforter, not comments
So be it, today, yesterday, and every post to come.
This is my prayer I have made on earth, over this keyboard…
may it be ratified in heaven.
Amen.

Still small voice

Hello everyone!! Sorry for not posting yesterday.  I was bitten by the stomach bug going around.  Think I got it from my little precious.  Still a little weak so this post will probably be short.  I thank God He is a healer. Even though this was a mild thing in comparison to what other people are suffering with, it reminded me to stay planted in the Word.  Confess healing scriptures even when I feel great, confess financial scriptures when the money is right, etc.  Don't wait until the situation turns sour to get in the Word, you may feel to weak, or down to do it.  The Word should be in us already so it can rise up when needed. You won't always have time to get your bible.  So do it while you can.  Valuable lesson for me, but God is a healer and we are both feeling better!!

I spoke with my sweet friend a few days ago, and her son was doing a lot better.  The nurses were going to sit him up. He finally got his ice chips too! His little mouth was so dry, so I bet those ice chips tasted sooo good!  She is at peace knowing all is well with him.  She is driving back and forth everyday and going to work so please keep her lifted up as she travels.  While talking with her I learned another valuable lesson about listening to that small voice inside. 

After I dropped her to get her car that day, the Holy Spirit whispered to me to give her some oil for her son.  Our church handed out small containers of anointing oil a while back, and I keep one in my car.  Well I talked myself out it.  I told myself she probably had some, I didn't want her to think I was trying to be all "holy" carrying oil in my car (how stupid is that), it was too late to turn around.  I came up with all types of things.  I drove back home soon forgetting about that oil.  God didn't!  When I talked to her a few days after that, she told me something her son struggled with since being in the hospital. She hadn't told anyone else, and at the time she said I don't know why I am telling you this, I haven't even told my mom.  She told me the situation and said "I prayed over him, but the only thing I wish I had was some oil"  She said, "I wish I had some oil to anoint him and his hospital room"  OMG!!!!!!  The signals went off!  I told her what the Holy Spirit prompted me to do, but I ignored Him.  We were both in awe!! All she could say was "I didn't know why I was telling you that, we don't know each other that well, but I just felt I needed to tell you"!  Let's just say I learned my lesson!  We both laughed, but inside I was so disappointed! I had not listened, I didn't obey.  I had something that was to be a blessing to someone else and didn't act on it out of fear!!

Needless to say, Mark brought her the oil the next day!  Quite dramatically of course, LOL.   He held it up like it was oil straight from heaven, you just have to know my husband! LOL Praise God!  God is so awesome, and that voice can come when you least expect it.  It may not make sense, but listen to it. You may be the very person God is using to bring about someone's healing or blessing.  You may be the person they are praying for!  I told her from now on I am listening. I don't care if the Holy Spirit says give that person a nickle.... hey they may need $100 and only have $99.95, that nickle would be a miracle in their eyes.  Listen, listen, listen!

1 Kings 19:11-12  New King James Version (NKJV)

 Then He said, “Go out, and stand on the mountain before the LORD.” And behold, the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind tore into the mountains and broke the rocks in pieces before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire; and after the fire a still small voice.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Update - Please read

Hi everybody!! I have to apologize for the lyrics I posted yesterday. A few lines of them were wrong. I copied them from a website but when I listened to the actual song this morning I heard the correct lyrics. I knew something didn't look right but I wasn't sure.
  

Looking the part just to play the game 
Cutting cut up face back looks the same  
They're just pass stars making a name  
So shut your part it is a crying shame   

It should read:
Looking the part just to play the game
Cookie cutter faith that looks the same
Religious rock stars making a name
So churified, it's a crying shame


Incorrect: Not stopping Love and joy, Peace and kindness Gentleness and self control 
Nothing, nothing is more beautiful
I wanna' look like love I wanna' look like, live like faith I wanna' live this life in me showing my face I wanna' look like hope I wanna' look like, live like grace And I know just where to start I'll let you feel my beauty mark
 
 
Should be:
Dressed up in Love and joy, Peace and kindness Gentleness and self control  
nothing, nothing is more beautiful
I wanna' look like love I wanna' look like, live like faith 
I wanna' let this life in me show on my face  
I wanna' look like hope I wanna' look like, live like grace  
And I know just where to start I'll let you feel my beauty mark
 
I know it's probably not a big deal, but I wanted to clarify. Those previous lyrics didn't make sense! LOL
 
Now here is a quick update on my friend's son. 
 
Please keep them in your prayers.   Once she got home she got him to the hospital, as he was in terrible, terrible pain. She could barely dress him and get him in the car. He was throwing up and could not stand up straight, laying in a fetal position most of the time. We all thought it was appendicitis because of the bad pain in his stomach. They took samples and gave him Morphine for pain (it was that bad).  The doctor felt his stomach and ruled out appendicitis, but did say his stomach was hard.  The hospital in Baytown rushed him by ambulance to TX Children's Hospital right away.  He had surgery at 5:40 this morning.  
 
The surgeon found a large pool of blood near his intestines. That's where the pain was radiating from. His intestines somehow became bruised and over the course of days started to bleed.  I believe she also said it caused his kidney to become infected. The doctors are baffled and don't know how something like this could happen.  My friend said the only thing her son told her was about 2 weeks ago he got hit in the stomach playing football, but he was fine after that, eating and going about his normal routine,  until this weekend.  Now they must insert a tube in his side to drain any remaining blood, and he will be fed by a tube through the nose.  This young man is only 14 and had no previous medical conditions.  He is terrified, and so is mom.  
 
Her family is small and only consists of her mother, grandmother, sister and nephew.  Her mother can't be with her because she takes care of her grandmother who is 93, has dementia, and is on a feeding tube herself.  Please pray for them!  Her mother is beside herself.  He is expected to remain in the hospital for 3 to 4 weeks, and does not want his mother out of his sight.  Her concern is her job, she needs to work, has to work to support her family.  She gets no support from her ex husband. 
 
I offered to go sit with her but her nephew was on his way so her and her daughter could go home, get bathed, changed and try to eat. They didn't pack anything because they didn't expect it to be this bad.  Plus she has to get her daughter back in school.  Let's bombard the heavens for this family.  I talked with her at 8:15 this morning and she still had not seen him because he was in the ICU recovery room so she wasn't sure if he knew anything.  I haven't talked her to since that time.  Just trying to let them get settled.  I will keep everyone updated on his progress.  When I talk with her she sounds so peaceful, even as she deals with anxiety herself but she is keeping it together for her kids.  She is just trying to be rational, not overact or panic.  She knows nothing about Houston, and was nervous about making the drive back home.  Her kids are her world, they are all she has.  
 
Also please lift her daughter up as she is dealing with depression (she's only 12).  She deals with anger issues that surprisingly stem from her father.  My friend thought this was strange because her daughter was so small when her dad left, and they have no contact with him.  They started counseling and it came out during the session.  My friend said they were filling out the paperwork, and one of the questions was "Please check any family members that you are having problems with" The little girl checked so hard where it said father, my friend asked "Why did you that?" She checked it with such anger and force, sad part is, the little girl didn't even realize she did it.  She didn't know why!  Her daughter told her she doesn't know why she gets so angry, she just does.
 
Now you see why I said she showed me how to keep things in perspective.  You never know what people are dealing with.  I will keep you guys posted! I know God is a healer, and a miracle worker.  This family needs one!
 
Thank you!!
 

Monday, October 24, 2011

Unexpected Blessings

Hello everyone! Praying everyone had a great weekend!

I am getting straight to it today. Y'all the Lord has blessed me tremendously today and I HAVE to share!! Man where to start.  I want to apologize first if this post is too long, but God is just AWESOME! 

Ok, so I am chilling, sitting at the computer, just fed Kalena.  She's nice and content playing........ Ahhhhh, my time to relax for a bit.  Just then Mark calls, I'm like "Hey, what's up?"  I could tell in his voice he was getting ready to ask me something that he really didn't want to ask.  (I love my husband, and his concern for people.  He has a heart that reaches out to anyone.  He will pick up a homeless man and treat him like royalty! God bless him).  He begins to tell me that the new girl that works there just got a call that her son is sick, Uh huh... and she didn't drive her car today, uh huh.....pause...... all I could think and what does that have to do with you ?(shame on me) you are not driving her anywhere.  I didn't say that but you know.....so he's like I thought about letting her use my car (nope) but that's not a good idea.....by then I know where this is going.  He asks if I would mind bringing her to check on her son. UHHHHHHHHHHH, OK.  All I can think is, dang it, I already told you I didn't want to drive out there today, he works in Port Arthur. (selfish a little)

Of course I say yes!  Very reluctantly.  What type of person would I be if I said no, right?  So I get dressed, she calls.  Not sounding very enthusiastic about the idea herself,  she asks about how long it might take me to get there.  I start rushing around, I am still in my PJ's, hadn't taken a bath, Kalena pooed, hair not combed!  So during that call she says "yeah Mark said you wouldn't mind driving me to Baytown to check on my son" UHHHHHH Baytown, I don't remember that coming up!!  I didn't tell her this, I just play it off, "sure no problem" we finalize everything, and hang up.  Since she didn't sound very grateful, (she was, but had some other issues going on that I found out about) I start taking my time.  God quickly reprimands! How would I feel if I were miles away and had a sick child I couldn't get to immediately???  On the one day I decide not to drive at that, because I am a single mom trying to save gas, so I ride the company bus to work! "Forgive me Lord".  We find out really quickly what ugliness is in us when God places a demand on us to do something for Him that we don't "want" to do.  I also learn, be careful how you treat people, you never know what they are going through. When someone is stressed they don't need your attitude making it worse!!

I start talking to God, He's on the main line so I start telling Him all about it!! LOL  Then something happens.  My blog the other day about Surrender comes to mind......... Pause again, how many times do we beg, plead, cry for God to use us, but when the opportunity comes and it's not how "we" want to be used we cringe.  I tell you, If you haven't totally surrendered to God, when He asks you to do something that takes you out of your comfort zone, whatever is still ugly in you will come.  And it did, strong! I am ashamed to say, but hey I like to keep it real. I don't like to be out of my comfort zone, I am content to sit here in from of my computer talking about all the great things the Lord has done, instead of getting out there and helping Him do some of those great things.  Shame!

So I get on the road, praying the whole way saying, Lord I am doing this for you, I don't know what your plan is, but whatever it is I surrender.  He knows I am not feeling this at all. The more I talk to Him, the more at peace I feel. This just reminds me not to be led by my feelings, just act and the feelings will catch up! I am listening to Natalie Grant's Cd, and the song Beauty Mark comes on! WOW speaks directly to me!!  ( I will post the lyrics at the end) He reminds me, "didn't you just write that you want to please Me more than breathe"??? Yes Lord, "well here is an opportunity" OK Lord.  I surrender!  My heart, my emotions, my feelings.  I am not really an affectionate person.  Many people that know me may say "awww Nikki's so sweet" awww Nikki this, Nikki that" but what they don't know is Nikki is not an affectionate person "by nature".  Ask my mom how I hug, LOL.  I am not comfortable (there is that word again) showing my feelings.  Sure, I can be emotional, I cry at sad commercials, I feel "sorry" for people. 

That's dangerous right there! God showed me that! He doesn't need children that "feel sorry"  He needs children that can get into gear and be about His business. The world feels sorry, has apathy.  We are to be children of action!! How many times do we "feel sorry" for people in bad situations? We think "Oh my gosh, how horrible, someone should really do something" or if we are really "saved" we might send some money to help out, send clothes, food. Yeah that appeases our minds and flesh to say "well at least you did something right"??? Those things are all good, don't get me wrong.  We are not all called to be missionaries in third world countries, and sometimes it's not possible to help everyone but we can all do something for someone.  We are called to do that. We are called to be the hands and feet of Jesus Himself. What do you do when that helping demands you to give more than just money, more than just clothes, more than feeling sorry, but actually calls you to give of yourself,  your time, your resources??? Now we don't like that.  It's our time right??  We work hard, we need and deserve "our time". 

What we fail to realize is,  It's really not our time, it's God's time that He is allowing us to use!  That was a new revelation to me!! How are we using the time, and resources that God has entrusted to us?  We all want to cry out like Isaiah, "Send me Lord, I'll go" what happens when God calls you to go???  Do you go with a smile, willingly, cheerfully, praising and worshiping God , or do you want to pick the places you go, pick the people you help and go on your terms, when it's convenient for you?  Do you go with an attitude, complaining the whole time?  Thinking of everything it might cost you??  You might as well not go then, because God gets no glory out of that.  I was so ashamed, but so relieved that my Father loves me so much that He answers my prayers for change.  Change me Lord, let me not be complacent, and comfortable.  Didn't think He would move so soon, LOL!!  All I could think is I am representing You Lord, and my husband. I should be honored that my husband sees something in me to even think to ask.  I could be one of those wives, that he could think "well I am sure not asking my wife, she would never do that".  I don't want to be that way, I don't want to be that wife. I want to represent him and our family well.  I want to be a wife he can be proud of.  Just like a child is known by their good deeds (Proverbs 20:11) so are adults!!

So back to the story.  I pick her up, she gets in the backseat with Kalena, okkk.....what she don't want to sit up front with me?? (flesh is a mess, sometimes even after you pray)   I have to remind myself, she doesn't know me, she's probably a little uncomfortable too, and plus she has a very sick son over an hour way that needs her.  It's not about me at this moment at all! God use me.  I am Your driver.  Whatever your plan I submit, if I am to pray.....I will pray..... listen........I will listen.......just drive......I will just drive.  I want to please you Lord! 

I must say God showed out!  We talked the entire way!  She shared her whole story with me. She reminded me without saying it, to keep things in perspective.  She is a single mother working a job to take care of her two kids.  She is doing the best she can with what she has. She left Port Arthur to give her kids a better environment.  She gladly makes that drive everyday, sometimes on weekends too, to do better for her kids, and to give them the best. She should be dead at the hand of her ex husband but God said NO!!  She is a living, breathing testimony and I am honored to be her driver today.  God you are Awesome.  Thank you for choosing me.  She thanked me, we hugged, she even blessed me with gas money( was not even on my mind).  This young woman living for God, her kids, and herself.  Not trying to be cute, not trying to get attention, but working and working hard with a bunch of men that don't know her struggles.  She's beautiful, but that doesn't matter, she has a job to do, and kids to take care of. 

I was so blessed.  Sometimes our blessings don't come the way we expect, and sometimes our blessings are ones we haven't prayed for, but when God blesses boy does he bless!  I am so glad I surrendered and submitted.  It's hard to explain, but I know God is preparing me for greater things, but I must not get complacent, I must not get comfortable.  God is always moving, always doing, so when He moves we must be ready to move, ready to act. There's not always time to pray, we should always be ready, and make the most of every opportunity, Colossians 4:5-6.  Don't wait for everything to perfect, or for you have more money.  You have everything you need to do something for God, and whatever you lack He will provide....along the way and as you go!  Remember when Jesus healed the 10 lepers?  They obeyed God came in faith for their healing, and they were healed AS THEY WENT!! (Luke 17:12-14) You don't receive your blessings sometimes until you GO!

Today I had the opportunity to chauffeur one of God's daughters, and just listen, she thanked me for that. All she needed and wanted was someone to listen, but she gave me so much more!

Lyrics to Beauty Mark, by Natalie Grant

What do you see when you look at me? Ten dollar words and philosophies 
How would you choose to define me? Cares for others or just cares what others think?
But there is more to me than just what meets the eye 
It's time to be the change inside
I wanna' look like love, I wanna' look like, live like faith, I wanna' live this life in me showing my face, I wanna' look like hope, I wanna' look like, live like grace  
And I know just where to start I'll let you be my beauty mark
 
Looking the part just to play the game 
Cutting cut up face back looks the same  
They're just pass stars making a name  
So shut your part it is a crying shame   

But I'll put the finger on nobody else but me (Nobody else but me)  
It's time to be the dreams we need .
I wanna' look like love I wanna' look like, live like faith I wanna' live this life in me showing my face   I wanna' look like hope I wanna' look like, live like grace And I know just where to start I'll let you be my beauty mark

 
Not stopping Love and joy, Peace and kindness Gentleness and self control Nothing, nothing is more beautiful
I wanna' look like love I wanna' look like, live like faith I wanna' live this life in me showing my face I wanna' look like hope I wanna' look like, live like grace And I know just where to start I'll let you feel my beauty mark

I'm gonna' let you be my beauty mark
I wanna' look like hope (look like hope) I wanna' look like, live like grace And I know just where to start I'll let you be my beauty mark

I'll let you be my beauty mark