Bible Gateway

Monday, November 14, 2011

Favor in the eyes of our children

I know that title probably sounds funny.  You may say "why would a parent need favor in the eyes of their child?"  We are the parents right, and what we say should go right??

I agree, but I also remember being a child and the hard time I gave my mom.  I say my mom because I knew better than to look, talk, act, or even breathe sideways with my dad! LOL  It wasn't because he was mean or anything like that.  Quite the opposite, he probably let us get away with more than my mom, LOL. He would always say " Let them children be". I just knew better though, there was an invisible line I didn't want to cross.

So yeah, I apologize to my mom, alot.  Especially now that I have an almost teenager on my hands!!

It's not easy by any means, raising someone that is so similar to the way you were when you were a child.  Galatians 6:7 rings through my ears.  That's not to say my child is a bad child, far from it. She is just....ahem, strong willed, LOL.  She has a strong personality, and sometimes you forget you are dealing with a child!

But back to where I was going.  We are in the process of making some changes in our home.  My husband and I want to please God more than anything, which means we will have to stop allowing certain things into our home.  Things like certain movies, music, and images.  Of course they say "well it's only music, or it's just a cartoon" but what they don't realize it's sooooo much more than that.

I will be honest and say I hate addressing this with our children because it's hard to let go of certain things, especially when they have been allowed for so long.  Kids get tired of hearing "because I said so, or because God said so".  They want explanations.  

I know some old schooled parents would say, "Uh uh you don't have to explain anything to a child". While that may be true in some cases, I do feel kids need to know why we make the choices we make.  

We all know if we just say don't do that what's the first thing a child will do???  That starts while they are little.  Curiosity sometimes gets the best of them.  It goes all the way back to Adam and Eve. God said don't eat from this one tree and immediately they let the enemy stroke their curiosity nerve. 

It's in all of us.  

So as we make these changes I do pray we find favor with our children so their hearts will be receptive to see why we are making these changes, and it's not just because God said so, but here is why He said so.  This is where I need to make sure I am in my Word and hearing from God like I should!

Alot of times when parent's talk all kids hear are "blahblahblah" or you can't do this, or that.  My son likes to tell me "you never let me do..." when he asks me something and I say no.  I don't want them to think all they hear are rules.

I also more importantly don't want to them think God is just a God of rules, and judgements. I want them to see He wants what is best for them a million times more than we do. I want to make sure they know they have an enemy that is fighting tooth and nail for their souls, minds and very being.  He doesn't fight fair and will fight at all costs.  As parents we have to fight, even when it doesn't feel good because we know it's not about feelings at all.

This is why I pray for favor, and I pray for God's forgiveness in being so nonchalant about certain things we have allowed as to not offend our kids, or to just keep peace in our home.

If you think about it, it's not really keeping peace because you just create an atomosphere of confusion in the long run because now they will want to know "why did you let me do it before?" 

I will just continue to confess that God softens their hearts and allows them to really hear what we have to say and why we are making these changes.

Pray for your own children if you have them, or if you don't just pray for children in general. They need it more now than ever before!!  Our children have questions and we need to be ready with the answers!

Deuteronomy 11:19-21 New International Version (NIV)
Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 20 Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates, 21 so that your days and the days of your children may be many in the land the LORD swore to give your ancestors, as many as the days that the heavens are above the earth.


Anonymous said...

Good blog Nikki! You are so right, it is sometimes difficult having to tell our children "no" concerning some things. I remember having to do that, and I am still saying to our sons "no" to some things right now. Even though they are adults now, they are still living at home, under our roof, and under our rules, so we still give advice when we don't necessarily agree with some things that they want to do. God has anointed you and your husband to be parents! We often think of being anointed to sing, preach or other things, but we are also anointed to be parents! The Father, who is the greatest parent,lives in us and will always lead and guide us to be great parents. You are right Nikki, we do need favor with our children, and we do need to explain things to them, especially when we are making a decision based upon God'S desire for them. Keep up the good work, as a parent and as a blogger!

Anonymous said...

I love that you have created a blog to help others. I will continue to be a reader.

Thanks a bunch Nikki for your wise words.


Nikki said...

Thank you so much Miss Gayle for the encouragement! I used to confess that over myself and Mark all the time, but you know how you get comfortable with things. I need to start saying that again. God has anointed us and we will gracefully handle every situation that comes our way!!! :-)

Nikki said...

Kandye that means so much to me! If you only knew! I will keep going in the flow of the Holy Spirit. I give Him all the credit. You know me, quiet little Nikki! LOL So this is all Him. I just want to share my experiences and let people know they are not alone! :-)